In the past week, anyone near a TV has seen the video of the Iowa dam break. Basically, the lake took on so much rain that the dam gave way. Here take a look:
And sometimes I feel like the dam. There are many rains that fall in life and you take them in and you handle them well. Your faith-dam holds. But what about when the torrential rains come? How does your faith hold up? I really thought that my faith-dam was strong. And it is. But recently, it seems that while my dam held the monsoon season's rains; now when summer showers hit, the dam starts to crack. For a moment I was confused, I thought "why is the dam cracking under this little thing? If I survived the big thing, why can't I get past this minor thing?" But then I realized, that the big rain was still in my lake and that even the tiniest amount of rain right now caused fizzures in my spiritual dam. I haven't given the flood waters enough time to evaporate. And to make my metaphor clear: I hadn't given God enough time to work on the situation. Yes, He was keeping me strong under immense strain, but just becuase I am strong doesn't mean the situation is resolved. I believe that it will be resolved. I believed that the pressure will be lifted. I believe that God will evaporate the excess water/problem and lift it away. But just because I am dealing with 1 major problem doesn't mean that the other rains won't come. Life would be so much easier if we could deal with 1 issue at a time. But that isn't how life works, is it?
So here is the plan: I know my resevoir is full. I can't take on any more water by myself. So I have to call on my spiritual corps to assist me, to cover me when I can't do anymore, to shore me up so that my dam doesn't give way. And to those friends/prayer warriors that step in to cover me; I say "thank you."
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
Tuesday, July 6, 2010
Our Place *******FICTION *********
I am sitting in that place where we always used to go. You know the place over on 15th Street. Of course you know the place. It's our place. I avoided this spot for so long. Months. 13 months to be exact. You see it was hard for me to go to a place where we used to go. It was our spot. So it was difficult for me to go to a place where I never went. We went. It was our place. Our base camp. Our magical spot where we were able to be the main characters in our love story. You know what I mean? I don't think anyone knew me there. They knew us, but not me. The bartender would automatically hand me two drinks - my 1800 and your Knob Creek - without me asking. The DJ would catch a glimpse of us in the corner and announce our presence. From the moment we walked into the place quick hugs and dap were extended. We were the king and queen of this little piece of land. Until...
Until the kingdom fell apart. Until we were no longer we but you were you and I was me. And where did that leave our place on 15th Street? At first I avoided going there because I was afraid of running into you. I mean what do you say to the person who was your soulmate, your love, your breath. That sounds weird to even say in the past tense. But you were all of that and more. How do you enter into sacred space without the tidal wave of emotions overtaking and crushing you? And of course I worried, what if you were there with someone else? How would I react when someone that was a piece of me is now sharing himself with someone else? So I stayed away from our spot. At times I would see folks we knew out and about, at other spots around the city. The conversation was always the same. "Hey, how are you? You look good. Where's...?" You know how that conversation goes. I missed you. And I missed our spot. While I knew that you were rare and irreplaceable, I tried to recreate our spot in other places. I visited many restaurants and clubs looking for my place among the crowd. But every place fell short. I thought about coming back here but every time I hesitated and thought "I'm just not ready." Until tonight. Tonight I got dressed, tied my hair back, and set out to visit our place. I set out to change our place into my place. So as I sit at this table, smiling at a few familiar faces and observing the new ones, I think I've finally conquered my fear. Yes, I remember the corner where we... and the bathroom where I... and the dance floor where... But I am ok. I am here and it feels right. I take a sip of my drink and close my eyes. I smile because I am grateful that this little piece of heaven still fits, still smells like home. I breathe deeply. My exhale expels the remnants of we-ness and the inhalation fills my soul with optimism. I am whole. The night is ending and the crowd diminishing. I pay my tab, gather my things and head towards the door. Just as I put out my hand to open the door it swings open for me and there you are. But you no longer reside in me and our we is no longer we and I can see in your face that you are surprised to see me and don't know what to do with the various emotions that are raging behind your eyes. And I am so grateful that you taught me how to be a we. I am grateful that I survived the fall of our kingdom and still found that I could be me with out being we. I am thankful that through you I have known love, and that through our end I have been introduced to my strength. So I smile and say, "Thank you," as I head out the door.
Until the kingdom fell apart. Until we were no longer we but you were you and I was me. And where did that leave our place on 15th Street? At first I avoided going there because I was afraid of running into you. I mean what do you say to the person who was your soulmate, your love, your breath. That sounds weird to even say in the past tense. But you were all of that and more. How do you enter into sacred space without the tidal wave of emotions overtaking and crushing you? And of course I worried, what if you were there with someone else? How would I react when someone that was a piece of me is now sharing himself with someone else? So I stayed away from our spot. At times I would see folks we knew out and about, at other spots around the city. The conversation was always the same. "Hey, how are you? You look good. Where's...?" You know how that conversation goes. I missed you. And I missed our spot. While I knew that you were rare and irreplaceable, I tried to recreate our spot in other places. I visited many restaurants and clubs looking for my place among the crowd. But every place fell short. I thought about coming back here but every time I hesitated and thought "I'm just not ready." Until tonight. Tonight I got dressed, tied my hair back, and set out to visit our place. I set out to change our place into my place. So as I sit at this table, smiling at a few familiar faces and observing the new ones, I think I've finally conquered my fear. Yes, I remember the corner where we... and the bathroom where I... and the dance floor where... But I am ok. I am here and it feels right. I take a sip of my drink and close my eyes. I smile because I am grateful that this little piece of heaven still fits, still smells like home. I breathe deeply. My exhale expels the remnants of we-ness and the inhalation fills my soul with optimism. I am whole. The night is ending and the crowd diminishing. I pay my tab, gather my things and head towards the door. Just as I put out my hand to open the door it swings open for me and there you are. But you no longer reside in me and our we is no longer we and I can see in your face that you are surprised to see me and don't know what to do with the various emotions that are raging behind your eyes. And I am so grateful that you taught me how to be a we. I am grateful that I survived the fall of our kingdom and still found that I could be me with out being we. I am thankful that through you I have known love, and that through our end I have been introduced to my strength. So I smile and say, "Thank you," as I head out the door.
Monday, July 5, 2010
Pedestals
Lauryn Hill "Superstar"
I had a lovely conversation with some menfolks from church yesterday about role models. What constitutes a role model in your book? Are athletes role models? Are musicians role models? Are actors? Lots of parents seem to be totally disappointed when a celebrity makes a mistake. We see it all the time. Just turn on CNN or Fox. Let miscellaneous celebrity get arrested for DUI. The local parents group expert will sit on a national news set and talk about how this is bad for your children. How they are ruining kids' lives with their misdeeds. Really?
I tend to think that when celebrities make mistakes it is a chance to have conversations with your children about the consequences of those actions. I think it is a great moment to sit down with your child and tell them that even the celebrities have faults. That they are just people. That EVERYONE makes mistakes and can move on. Great moment to teach about God's forgiveness and mercy.
It's also a great opportunity to teach your children to never put people on pedestals. Especially ones that they are not prepared to sit on themselves. Can we really be shocked when a celeb gets a DUI when you drive home from the club drunk? Can we really be upset when musician gets arrested for drug possession when you were smoking weed while listening to their music? Can we really be crushed when a hollywood couple breaks up due to infidelity when you are currently cheating on your spouse?
Now I am not saying that you have to support with your buying power or condone bad behavior. I am saying that you have to understand that as a human,celebs are going to fall just like you do. I pray that the pedestal that you put them on doesn't become your cross.
Just as Christ was a superstar, you stupid star
They'll hail you then they'll nail you, no matter who you are
They'll make you now then take you down
And make you face it, if you slit the bag open
and put your pinky in it, then taste it
I had a lovely conversation with some menfolks from church yesterday about role models. What constitutes a role model in your book? Are athletes role models? Are musicians role models? Are actors? Lots of parents seem to be totally disappointed when a celebrity makes a mistake. We see it all the time. Just turn on CNN or Fox. Let miscellaneous celebrity get arrested for DUI. The local parents group expert will sit on a national news set and talk about how this is bad for your children. How they are ruining kids' lives with their misdeeds. Really?
I tend to think that when celebrities make mistakes it is a chance to have conversations with your children about the consequences of those actions. I think it is a great moment to sit down with your child and tell them that even the celebrities have faults. That they are just people. That EVERYONE makes mistakes and can move on. Great moment to teach about God's forgiveness and mercy.
It's also a great opportunity to teach your children to never put people on pedestals. Especially ones that they are not prepared to sit on themselves. Can we really be shocked when a celeb gets a DUI when you drive home from the club drunk? Can we really be upset when musician gets arrested for drug possession when you were smoking weed while listening to their music? Can we really be crushed when a hollywood couple breaks up due to infidelity when you are currently cheating on your spouse?
Now I am not saying that you have to support with your buying power or condone bad behavior. I am saying that you have to understand that as a human,celebs are going to fall just like you do. I pray that the pedestal that you put them on doesn't become your cross.
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