I readily admit that I am not a fashion blogger. I am a marriage blogger. But you know my stance that strong marriages are the cornerstone of a strong family which in turn support strong communities. So today's post is about strengthening the community. And I have 1 question that I need to ask: When did stripper/hooker chic become acceptable?
I recently attended an event where the average age of attendance was 20-24. And I am sorry to say that my sistas were looking atrocious. I could not tell the college students from street walkers. Not the high end, DC secret service prostitutes. Nope, I am talking about the strung out crackish street walkers. I really wish I was embellishing. But I am not. I am serious.
Yesterday, I posted a comical look at this situation on facebook (you can see the comments here), but today I am really worried. Is this all that we have become? Is this an attempt to get male attention? Are women no matter how smart or how accomplished now resorting to looking like tramps to get male attention? I am not knocking sexiness. Believe me. I am not knocking looking fine. I am not even knocking someone for making a fashion misstep. I've made several of those and will continue to make more. (Thank God for my fashionable friends to help direct me.) But what I saw wasn't just 1 sister or just a couple... there was a sea of ladies in street walker-esque attire. And that is a problem.
So here is what I want to say to those young sisters. Do you. Express yourself fashionably, but ask yourself when you look in the mirror, this one question: who is this for? Are you wearing these clothes because this is how you define yourself? Are you dressing to live up to some hypersexualized version of black womenhood? Are you nothing more than tits and ass? Are you amazing enough to garner attention in jeans, a turtleneck, and flats or do you have to wear this costume to attract attention? Ask yourself: do I look sexy or desperate? Really answer the questions.
Believe me. I've made horrible fashion choices. I've shown more skin than I should have. But when you know better you try to do better. And I am trying to do better. Why? Because when I get dressed to go out, I have to walk past 2 daughters who look to me as an example. I have to be an example that is strong, sexy, smart. I have to counteract the things that they see when they leave the house. My best friend once said to me, "I don't want to walk into a room and have men think 'I want to f*** her.' I want to walk into a room and have them think 'I want to get to know her.'" Wise words, right?
So, sisters, take a look at yourself BEFORE you leave the house. Put up the hooker barbie costume and be the smart, beautiful women that I know that you are.
Agreed! I feel that some women don't really know the difference between sexy and slutty and that's sad. When you have a group of women that run together and not one of them looks like a lady, it makes me wonder where is the voice of reason in that group.
ReplyDeleteI wish I could mentor them all, but that's not the case. Less is more! Boom!