Love Jones-ing

Do you remember the movie "Love Jones?"  What is that a smile?  Yep,  everyone remembers "Love Jones."  (If not, stop right now and order Netflix or Amazon or something and watch the movie NOW.)  This often quoted, much beloved movie has tons of great lines.  But tonight I am dealing with one.  You remember this one, right?  Say it with me:

"Romance is about the possibility of things. You see it's about the time between when you first meet some fine woman and when you first make love to her. And when you first ask a woman to marry you and when she says I do. When people that have been together for a long time say the romance is gone, what they're really saying is that they've exhausted the possibility." -- Darius Lovehall

Ooooooh!  Ladies, remember this line?  Fellas, weren't you in the theater nodding when you first heard this?  Yes!  And guess what?  It is so true.  The lack of surprise.  The lack of anticipation.  The humdrum of settling into a routine can really sap the romance. 

Now, let me state clearly: There has to be a balance between spontaneity and stability.  You can't be so passionate that the light bill isn't getting paid.  But you can't be so solely focused on stability that the passion fades and you turn into business partners or roommates.  So there has to be a balance.  But quite often the pendulum swings to the land of the boring.  And don't add kids to the mix!  Whoo! By the time you climb the corporate ladder, hit a gymnastics class, do homework, and try to feed the family it is hard to make passion a priority. 

But guess what?  You have to make the passion a priority! You have to invest in each other.  You have to step away from the humdrum and really do something OUTSIDE OF THE BOX together.  Don't just do what he likes or what she likes.  Do something that neither one of you has done before.  Try something totally outside of your comfort zone. 

The hubs and I went salsa dancing just the other day.  While we may never be on "Dancing with the Stars,"  we had a great time!  And it fanned the passion flame.  I am excited about what we are going to try next.. But I do know this much.. I am determined to never exhaust the possibility of romance. 

#MarriagePrayer 4/30/12

Father, thank You for a new week.  Father, I want to write have Your way.  Father, send the Holy Spirit to renew our fire.  Father, You designed marriage to be a ministry.  Ignite us anew so that we can continue on glorifying You through loving each other.  Father, stoke the fire of our hearts.  Turn the heat up.  Help us to not only say 'yes' to whatever You ask but to say 'yes' with passion.  Father, we love You and thank You.  Amen.  Amen.

#MarriagePrayer 4/27/12

Just because I am a writer, doesn't mean that I am the only writer.  Today, I am sharing the page.

"Father, move the negative things to my past.  Make my tomorrows greater than my yesterdays.  I love You and thank You. Amen.  Amen."

#MarriagePrayer

Father, help us.  Amen.

Hooker Chic

I readily admit that I am not a fashion blogger.  I am a marriage blogger.  But you know my stance that strong marriages are the cornerstone of a strong family which in turn support strong communities.  So today's post is about strengthening the community.  And I have 1 question that I need to ask:  When did stripper/hooker chic become acceptable?

I recently attended an event where the average age of attendance was 20-24.  And I am sorry to say that my sistas were looking atrocious.  I could not tell the college students from street walkers.  Not the high end, DC secret service prostitutes.  Nope, I am talking about the strung out crackish street walkers.  I really wish I was embellishing.  But I am not.  I am serious. 

Yesterday, I posted a comical look at this situation on facebook (you can see the comments here), but today I am really worried.  Is this all that we have become?  Is this an attempt to get male attention?  Are women no matter how smart or how accomplished now resorting to looking like tramps to get male attention?  I am not knocking sexiness.  Believe me.  I am not knocking looking fine.  I am not even knocking someone for making a fashion misstep.  I've made several of those and will continue to make more.  (Thank God for my fashionable friends to help direct me.)  But what I saw wasn't just 1 sister or just a couple... there was a sea of ladies in street walker-esque attire.  And that is a problem. 

So here is what I want to say to those young sisters.  Do you.  Express yourself fashionably, but ask yourself when you look in the mirror, this one question:  who is this for?  Are you wearing these clothes because this is how you define yourself?  Are you dressing to live up to some hypersexualized version of black womenhood?  Are you nothing more than tits and ass?  Are you amazing enough to garner attention in jeans, a turtleneck, and flats or do you have to wear this costume to attract attention?  Ask yourself: do I look sexy or desperate?  Really answer the questions. 

Believe me.  I've made horrible fashion choices.  I've shown more skin than I should have.  But when you know better you try to do better.  And I am trying to do better.  Why? Because when I get dressed to go out, I have to walk past 2 daughters who look to me as an example.  I have to be an example that is strong, sexy, smart.  I have to counteract the things that they see when they leave the house.  My best friend once said to me, "I don't want to walk into a room and have men think 'I want to f*** her.'  I want to walk into a room and have them think 'I want to get to know her.'"  Wise words, right? 

So, sisters, take a look at yourself BEFORE you leave the house.  Put up the hooker barbie costume and be the smart, beautiful women that I know that you are.

My funny take on the bad fashion faux pas...

Here are my notes about what you should and should not wear!!!

1.  Ladies, when did stripper/hooker chic become fashionable? If a man/woman stops you and ask you for a price list for your services, then you might need to change clothes?

2.   Ladies, if your leggings have a cotton crotch.. guess what? they aren't leggings. They are tights and are meant to be worn under something.

3.   Ladies, if your skirt is so short that you need you "lawn trimmed" before you put it on, then it is too short for you? You get a double "no-no" if you wear said skirt w/your child on your hip!

4.   Music Video fashion is for music videos.. it is an augmented reality.. that is not meant to be worn on the streets. So unless you are singing on a stage somewhere.. please do not wear the following: bras as tops, panties as shorts, leotards outside the dance studio...

5.   My larger ladies (and I am putting myself in this category).. the cheap form fitting dress from Forever21 is not your friend. If your tummy is bigger than your booty, it really isn't for you.

6.   Get to know your undergarments. Walmart and Target both make support undergarments. Get to know them well. Why? Because in the words of Tamar, back fat "Aint hot."

7.   Men, really? Really? sagging skinny jeans.. I know Wayne did it, but it isn't cute. Trust me on this one.

8.   Ladies, wearing your size 4 jeans under your size 12 belly means that you wear a 12! Embrace it! Love it. Let the 4 and the muffin top go!

9.   Ladies, quit trying so hard to be haute couture. Some things are fashionable and some things just don't match. Learn the difference.

#MarragePrayer 4/25/12

Father, thank You for today.  Thank You for another day to get it right.  Thank You for working with me over and over again.  Father,  deal w/me and my carnality.  I know better.  I say I want to do better.  But I continuously make the same mistakes.  So Father, thank You for being patient w/me.  Renew me every hour, every minute, until I can walk consistently in obedience.  Father, give me the strength to resist myself.  Because i know that if i resist my own flesh and obediently follow You then everything else will fall into place.  Father, I love You.  I thank You.  Amen.  Amen.

#MarriagePrayer 4/24/12

Good Morning! Father, thank You for using every moment to teach me more about myself.  Father, You have shown me that hearsay is not fact.  That I should always keep focused on the things I can change and pray for Your hand on rest.  Father, keep me from making premature judgements of other people.  I appreciate how You use everyday interactions to help me increase  my awareness of my faults.  Father, help me to lead with love not just in my marriage, but in the workplace, in the world.  Jesus, I love You and thank You.  Amen.  Amen.

#MarriagePrayer 4/23/12

Father, let me just take a moment to say Thank You!  Let me be real honest, You know I am not in the best mood or mindset.  And this morning I really struggled with what to write.  But I figured folks need to see that worshiping You isn't always pretty and poetic.  Today, I just need to talk to You.  More importantly, I need You to talk to me.  Father, make something easy and light today.  There is so much going on.  So many people leaning on me.  Can You please make something light today?  And if You don't remove any burdens, can You at least cheer me on while I labor through them?  Let me hear Your voice again so that I can keep working w/pep in my step.  Help me narrow my focus and really do/say/become exactly what You want me to do/say/become.  Father, I love You and thank YOU for listening to me and for answering my prayers.  But I really thank You for just being You.  Amen.  Amen.

#MarriagePrayer 4/20/12

Father, thank You.  Thank You for Your mercy.  Thank You for Your love. Thank You for Your patience.  Thank You for being a hedge around me.  Thank You for never turning Your back on me.  Thank You for loving a mess like me.  Thank You for the cross.  Father, Jesus, Holy Spirit, Thank You.  Amen.

#MarriagePrayer 4/19/12

Father, thank You for today.  Thank You for allowing growth opportunities for our marriage.  Father, I might not understand why You are doing something but I trust YOU.  I worship You.  And I know that if You allow something to happen, then it must be for my growth and Your glory.  Father, I want to thank You for blessing my husband.  Thank You for making a way for him to advance in his career.  Father, please bless all of the other husbands who are prayerfully leading their households.  Give them a divine breakthrough to take their family to another level.  Bless them spiritually, emotionally, or financially.  Father, bless them as You see fit because You know what they want but also what they need.  Father, I love YOU and thank YOU.  Amen.

#MarriagePrayer 4/18/12

Father, thank You for today.  Father, thank You for forgiving me of my sins.  Thank You for paying the ultimate price for my mistakes at the cross.  Father, please help me to extend that love to those that have offended me.  Jesus, I know that I often forget that the love You extend to me is meant to be shared with others.  Father, help me to worship You by letting go of offenses.  Father, help me to bless those that have come against me.  Father, help me to bless them until my heart changes toward them.  Father, give me strength to do this task.  In Your awesome and matchless name I pray, Amen.  Amen!

Apologies and Forgiveness

Recently, there has been a scandalous story in the news about a local pastor accused of having an affair with a friend's wife and breaking up their marriage.  This post is not about that.  I am not trying to figure out if there was or wasn't an affair.  This post is about what the ex-husband of the woman said in an interview.  The husband stated that he just wanted the pastor to admit that he was wrong and ask for forgiveness.  This is the part that I not only understood but also made me empathize with him.

Why?  Well, if you've read anything that I've written you know my back story... my marriage history.  (If this is the first piece of mine that you are reading, you should really start here.)  I totally understand feeling wronged and wanting the person that wronged you to feel remorse and apologize.  It is only natural.  When someone hurts you, you want that hurt to be acknowledged and paid for by someone.  But that is where most people get it wrong.  Heck, that is where I got it wrong.  I wanted the mistress to acknowledge wrong doing.  I wanted her to apologize for her part in the situation.   When the apology never came, the task of healing rested solely with me.  If I hinge my forgiveness and subsequent healing on someone else's admission of wrong doing, I might never get healed.  You have to learn to forgive and heal on your own.  Let me say it again... You have to learn to forgive and heal on your own.  It makes sense if you really stop to think about it.  Why would you give someone else control of your healing?  Especially a person who has been deemed untrustworthy to begin with?  Forgiveness isn't easy but it frees you from the pain of the transgression.

And that is what this husband needs to understand.  A lawsuit won't heal his hurt.  A conversation with the aggressor won't erase his pain.  He has to  learn that forgiveness is a gift that you give yourself.

#MarriagePrayer 4/17/12

Father, help me today to be better than I was yesterday.  Let me be mindful of my actions.  If anything I do or say are not acceptable to You then let me remove them from my life.  Father, help me to grow closer to You.. to strive to be more like You.  Father, let me focus on YOU first every day.  Father, if everyone in my household is walking toward You then we are also growing closer together.  Father, be with us as we walk in faith.  Jesus, I love You and thank YOU.  Amen.  Amen.

#MarriagePrayer 4/16/12

Father, thank You for Your love.  Thank You for the gift of covenant with my spouse.  Father, please help me to be the wife that You want me to be.  Help me to bridle my tongue when necessary.  Give me the gift of discernment to know when to approach my husband with a problem.  Father, let me always remember to love with a servant's heart.  Give me strength to let small arguments go.  Father, guide me in making our home a place of rest, restoration, and relaxation.  Please make both of our work burdens light so that we have the strength and energy to sow into each other.  Father, I ask this is Jesus's name.  Amen.  Amen.

Are You a Godly Wife?

Years ago my child attended a Christian preschool and came home with this question, "Are you a godly wife, mama?"  When she asked me this question I had a good laugh and kept it moving.  Fast forward 5 years.  In hindsight I wish I had stopped to truly reflect on her question.  If I had to be honest with myself the answer was "nope.  I am not a godly wife."  I was a good wife but not a godly wife.  Now, Proverbs 31 is something that I actively try to attain... most days.  So here are a few questions to help you move a bit closer to Godly Wife status...

1.  Can you tell your husband the truth?  Can you be honest with him?

2.  If your husband came home and said "we are downsizing our lifestyle so that I can pursue the vision that God gave me," would you start packing up the family?  Can you follow his leadership and trust him as head of the household?

3.  Is your body a place of rest and restoration?  This goes beyond just having a great sex life.  Can your husband rest when he is home with you?

4.  Can you really shut up and let an argument go?  Can you?  This is the one that most wives have a problem with - including me.

5.  Do you encourage your husband to reach even higher than he thought he could?  Do you see greatness over your husband life?  Do you encourage him to think well of himself?

6.  Are you your husband's biggest supporter or greatest obstacle?  When he comes to you with a plan, do you cheer him on or do you tell him why it won't work?  Can he share his dreams with you?

#MarriagePrayer 4/13/12

Father,  today I come to You for job clarity for my spouse & myself.  Father, please speak plainly and make Your will known to us.  Father, throw open the doors that You want us to walk through and close tightly the ones that are wrong for us.  Father, if You want us to do something different in our careers, please make it plain.  We are willing to follow You.  We say "yes" to what You would ask of us.  We want to make sure that we are following Your will & not following our own pride.  Jesus, we love YOU and thank YOU.  Amen.  Amen.

#MarriagePrayer 4/12/12

Father, thank You for today.  Thank You for the gift of my spouse.  Father, today help us be a better team when it comes to raising our children.  Let us never play good cop bad cop.  Let us always be prayerful and united when making decisions regarding our children.  Let us remember to lead by example.  If we want our children to pray, then we must pray.  If we want our children to worship, then we must worship.  Father, help us to love our kids and seek Your guidance at every turn.  Father, I love You and thank You.  Amen.

#MarriagePrayer 4/11/12

Good Morning!  Father, I want You to know that today I am going to intentionally support my spouse.  I am going to intentionally forgive.  I am going to intentionally love.  Father, You love us in spite of our mess and I thank You for that unconditional love.  Today I am going to extend that love to my spouse.  I promise to love him despite his mess.  I will make the choice to lead with love.  Father, I know w/Your help I can love my spouse through the highs and the lows.  I thank You for that gift.  I thank You for loving me so much that I have love to extend around me.  Father, I praise You and bless You.  Amen.  Amen.

#MarriagePrayer 4/10/12

Father, thank You for today and another chance to grow closer to You & closer to my spouse.  I am so excited about all that You are doing in our marriage.  I know that if we keep covenant with You that You will give us the strength we need to reach personal goals and kingdom goals.  Father, help us as we try to improve individually so that we can give our spouses our best.  Let self improvement be yet another expression of love.  Let the changes that we make individually reflect positively on YOU & strengthen our marriage.  Father, I love You and thank YOU.  Amen,  Amen.

#MarriagePrayer 4/9/12

Father, thank You for Your sacrifice on the cross.  Thank You for the celebration yesterday of Resurrection Sunday.  Father, today let me keep my eyes on the cross.  Let me not forget Your sacrifice & Your power over death.  Since You got up with all power, I can now access that power through faith in You.  I can declare VICTORY over any marital strife.  I can declare victory over my finances.  I can declare victory over my children. I can declare victory over my job.  I declare victory over myself.  Let me always remember that the victory comes from YOU.  I love You and thank YOU.  Amen.  Amen.

Letters to My Daughters - Part 5: Love

Dear Asyen and Maya,

Here it goes.. the boy talk.  I am sure you are thinking "what more can she say?  She already talks about this subject too much."  (I bet Asyen is even rolling her eyes right now!)  But this is not about boys, this is about LOVE (and yes, there is a difference.)  I want you to know about love and finding a husband. 

Well, I mis-spoke.  A husband should find you.  But I want you to be able to discern if the man that says he wants to marry you is really your husband.  And you can't discuss marriage without first talking about love.  So let's just jump right into it.

1.  Falling in like, lust, and a version of love is easy but staying in love is a choice.  Don't let the butterflies in your stomach tell you that you are in love. That isn't love.  That could be infatuation, lust, or gas.  But love is "I trust you with all of me and even when I don't like you, can't stand the sight of you, and want to walk away from you, I will choose to love you because hurting you hurts me."  Until you get to this point in your relationship then you aren't truly in love. 

2.  Sex is great.  I am not going to lie and say "sex sucks" just to keep you from having sex.  Nope.  Not gonna do it.  Sex is AMAZING!  But let me explain it to you this way.  Imagine you are a trapeze artist in a circus.  You have climbed up the rope and you see your partner swinging toward you.  You are nervous and excited.  You reach out your hand and swing with your partner.  Now, if it is with the right person - a committed married relationship - you will keep swinging higher and higher.  You will turn tricks and flips because you trust that your partner will always catch you.  But if you are with the wrong partner, you will never get comfortable enough to let go and flip.  You will never find your rhythm and your partner can drop you.  And if your partner drops you, the effects can be emotionally devastating.

3.  You have to make sure that the man you marry has the following traits:
A.  He has to love God.  Your husband must love God and not be afraid to pray for and over you and the entire house.  Ask yourself this one question: "if I were dying, would I trust this man to pray over me?"  If the answer is "no," then he isn't your husband.

B.  You want a spouse that has vision  - both personally and collectively.  He has to have a plan and not be afraid to work the plan. 

C.  You want a spouse that has a work ethic.  Will he work for the betterment of the household?  Can you trust him to hold down a job?

D.  You want a spouse that can balance a budget.  Can you work together and manage the finances?

E.  You want a spouse that you can have fun with.  Can you hang out with your spouse?  Can you giggle with your spouse?  Do you have fun together?  Do you like being around each other?

4.  Having standards is not the same as having a list.  Don't be a woman that has a superficial list of traits that you want your spouse to have.  Things like "he has to be 6 ft tall and drive a Bentley" mean very little when they are 80 and in a hospital bed.  You can have standards - He must be honest, loving, kind - without being superficial.

5.  Don't look for anything in a mate that you yourself don't bring to the table.  I hate when people say "the man I marry must have a six pack and make at least $100-thousand" when they don't make $20-thousand and are obese.  You want to be equally yoked. 

6.  Finally - well, finally for tonight;  any love you are going to share with another person has to start with the love you have for yourself.  Love you.  Be complete by yourself.  The Word says you are "fearfully and wonderfully made."  It doesn't say you will be fearful and wonderful when you find Mr. Right.  It means that you right now by yourself are the bomb, or the jam, or whatever the hot word is when you read this. 

Remember, I love more than you know!  (and my standard disclaimer: I have the option to add more later.) 

Love you both,
~Mama

Letters to My Daughter - Part 4: Money

Dear Asyen and Maya,

You both know that this is an arena where Dad and I struggle.  So this is going to be really short....

1.  Follow this formula:
10% Tithe
20% save
25% living expenses (rent)
45% the rest of life goes here

2.  Don't charge stuff.  Instead save up for it and then pay cash.  The stress isn't worth the instant gratification you get when you charge something.

3.  Money isn't everything but money does make some things much easier.

3.  Honestly, don't have a big wedding.  Have a small wedding and a great honeymoon.  Save the rest of the money.  Buy a duplex.  Live in 1 half and rent out the other.  In 3-5 years take the money you saved and buy a single family home.  Keep the duplex as rental property.  Ta-da! You just built generational wealth.  Then for you 10 year anniversary have the wedding of your dreams.  Trust me on this one!

4.  Never be afraid to take a step back in order to take a leap forward. 

5. Finally, if you have questions beyond this ask Auntie Keri.  Believe me.  She has the answers!

Love you so much that I want you to do better than me on this one,
~Mama

#MarriagePrayer 4/6/12

It's Good Friday!  What more do you say other than "Father, thank You.  Jesus, thank You.  Thank You for thinking so much of me that you stayed on the cross when You could have gotten down at anytime.  Thank You for Your blood that was shed for my sins.  Thank You for this gift of salvation and mercy and love and selflessness and reconciliation.  Thank You! Amen."

#MarriagePrayer 4/5/12

Father, honestly it seems that every where I look my friends are facing trials and at times it feels as if I am walking barefoot on a path littered with broken glass.  Father, can You please move in my friends lives right now.  Many are dealing with loss and with pain.  They are struggling with stress, loneliness, and sickness.  Many marriages are being tried in this season.  Father, can You please just quiet the storms that are raging?  If the storms are needed to get us all to another level in You, then so be it.  But can You hold our hands so that we can face the storm w/o fear?  Hold it tight so that we know You not only by Your voice but also by Your touch.  Father, I love You and thank You.  Amen.  Amen.

#MarriagePrayer 4/4/12

Today is a cry out day.  No words.  Just "Father, please..."  and that's enough, because i know the Father hears me.

Letters to My Daughter - Part 3: Self Esteem & Beauty

Dear Asyen and Maya,

Since you are a Black woman in America, there will be many assaults on your self esteem.  You are much more than some tail.  You are much more than cute.  You are "fearfully and wonderfully made!"  You are some of God's best work!  Don't get cocky because everyone is God's best work because He doesn't make mess.  But you should believe that you are special, because you are.

If you want to have a healthy self esteem, then remember a few things.
1.  The way you look is important but who you are inside is more important.  Lead with nice.  Don't be a mean girl.  Don't wear bitchy as a badge of honor.  You an be assertive, aggressive, smart, witty, and NICE.  Too many people forget that.

2.  Pretty is fleeting, but smarts are forever.  Don't be the giggly girl that thinks being dumb is cute.  It's not.  Smart is cute.  Smart is wonderful.  Smart lasts forever.

3.  Don't feed your self-esteem a diet of crap.  If all you know is Style Magazine or music videos, then you will have no idea of how awesome you are.  But if you are reading Maya Angelou, Pearl Cleage, or Mildred Taylor, your self-esteem cup will be overflowing.

4.  Always think "I can do it" first.  There is nothing cute about "I can't."  Too many women believe they can't do something.  Saying "I don't want to do something" is totally different than saying "I can't do something."  You can speak Spanish.  You can change a tire.  You can paint a room.  You can fix the plumbing.  You might not want to, but you can.  And the only way that you will know that you can is by doing.  So do (fill in the blank).  (Guidepost:  Call Auntie Sjar.  Her adventurous spirit runs deep.  She believes that she can and she does!)

But there are a few things you should know about beauty.

1.  The first is that you have to define your own look.  Most people fall into one of 2 categories - signature style or style chameleon.  Folks with a signature style have a go-to look that influences all of their style decisions - think Mikki Taylor.  But there are other folks who are style chameleons - think Beyonce.  There are pros and cons of each but you have to figure out who you are and which style category you fall in.  Then own it!  Do You!

2.  Look your best.  That means no head rags, ashy-ness, or chapped lips.  Think about Grandy.  When Grandy steps out the door she is ready to meet and greet anyone.  She would not be embarrassed to say "hi" to anyone.  That doesn't mean that she is suited up all the time.  It just means that she is ready to face the day giving her best self.  We should all do the same.

3.  Wear clothes that fit your shape.  Some are apples.  Some are hourglasses.  Some are palm trees (ok I made that one up!) But everyone has a different shape.  So wear clothes that compliment your shape and don't try to be anyone else.  (Guidepost: If you need help with this call Miss Faith.  She is an awesome stylists!)

4.  Wear clothes that fit.  If you are a size 12, own it.  Don't stuff a 12 into an 8.  You just will look like a hot link sausage.  Actually a hot link would look better because it's at least smooth.  And speaking of smooth, undergarments are important.  Grandy wore girdles back in the day, but then the 70's came and girdles went out the window.  But guess what?  We are learning that the correct undergarments are so important.  I still hate panty hose, but the right underwear will have you looking together.  This isn't just for the curvier girls.  EVERYONE can benefit from the right undergarments.

There will be days when you will fill less than awesome.  Don't worry it happens to everyone.  Whenever you are feeling down and need a self-esteem boost, you should turn up India.Arie and Jill Scott.  (Just grab my ipod.)  Sing out LOUD!  Do a little dance.  But if that doesn't work, call me.  I will always tell you how awesome you are!

I love you more every day!
~Mama

#MarriagePrayer 4/3/12

Father, thank You for today.  Thank You for this beautiful morning.  Father, I come to You this morning praying for my husband.  Jesus, touch my husband  Please draw him closer to You.  Father, please remove anything that may be hindering him from leaping forward in his career.  Jesus, please show him how to be a priest over this household.  Father, give him the words to say that will sow Your Word into our children's lives.  I ask that You give him strength, courage, and just a peek at the blessings that You have stored for him.  Father, release some of those blessings now.  Shower him with Your love.  Father, thank You for answered prayers, for the times You said no, and for being GOD.  I love You and bless You.  Amen.

#MarriagePrayer 4/2/12

Father, thank You for today.   Father, this week is Holy Week & I just want to stop & thank You for the gift & sacrifice of Your Son, Jesus.  I am so grateful for all that You do for me on a daily basis but I want You to know that I am most grateful for the Blood of Jesus.  Thank You for dying on the cross for the forgiveness of my sins.  Without that amazing sacrifice, nothing else would come to pass.  So i want You to know this morning, that I appreciate the gift of salvation.  I appreciate every drop that was shed on my behalf.  Father, I love You & thank You.  Amen.  Amen.

Letters to My Daughters - Part 2: Health

Dear Asyen and Maya,

So, how did you like Part 1?  Well, here is Part 2 - Health.  Quit laughing.  I know, I know.  My health isn't the best.  But I can still tell you what not to do, right?  So here goes..

1 - Never work out.  Ever.  Instead find what you enjoy doing and do it.  If you love rock climbing, then climb rocks.  If you love dancing, then dance.  If you love running, then run.  I like walking.  I like the silence and time to myself.  I love dancing but it's hard finding adult dance classes.  Unfortunately, many adults stop doing what they love when they get older.  Don't you stop.  Always do something that feeds you and works your heart! To be honest, I hate the gym.  I really do.  I always feel like a gerbil on a wheel inside the gym.  But I do enjoy taking advantage of the Y pool in the summer so I keep a membership.  So if you

2 - Drink water.  Drink lots of water.  It helps in so many ways.  I don't like it, but it is important to drink it.  And don't add anything to it except real lemon.

3 - Make poo.  Poo is important.  Very important.  I know it is gross.  I know most people don't talk about it, but trust me, digestive health is very important.

4 - Get your wellness check ups.  With the way insurance rates are rising and personal budgets are declining, lots of people stop going to get wellness visits with their doctor.  Go at least once a year for a check up.  See where you are on the medical tests.  Discuss your family history with your doctor.  Set a health goal and go for it!  Knowledge is power especially when it comes to your health.

5 - Wear your retainer.  Wear your retainer.  Wear your retainer.  Why?  Because your dad and I did not wear  our retainer and our teeth are shifting.  And who wants braces twice in a lifetime?  No one!  So after your braces come off, please wear your retainer faithfully.

6 - Trust yourself.  If you feel that something is wrong with your body, trust yourself.  Seek answers.  Don't let doctors give you a just any old diagnoses.  Remember my tummy?  I never would have gotten any relief if I didn't push the doctor for more.  You know your body.  Trust yourself when it comes to your body.

7 - Eat to live.  Try to eat more veggies and fruit than everything else.   Don't waste your time eating crap.  Eat items that you love (Asyen - cheesecake, Maya - chips) in moderation.

Ok, so this is just 7 tips for heath.  Here is a disclaimer:  I get to add more as I see fit.  (But you knew that was coming, right?)

Love you more everyday!
~Mama